21 points was what i've got.
pathetic and bad huh?
kinda disappointed with myself too.
mum was the first to know and she was damn upset with my results.
the way she said it was so hurtfully to me.
that was when i started to cry, officially.
i felt stupid helpless useless, everything negative.

i called Caca next.
she was crying too cuz she had the same results as her prelims.
her L1R5 is like 16points and yet she was disappointed cuz she didnt improve much.
but still her marks is way better then mine.

then i called Dian.
this time i cried more as i told her what my mum said.
i just cant help myself.
i felt like shit u noe.

then Jeb called me.
cried.
he told me just to ignore my mum as she is that kind of a person.
but i cant cuz everything she say i will take it to my heart.

then i asked Slimy to call me.
and again i cried and let out how i felt.
*thanx Slimy for taking your time to call me*

when i finally thought the drama was all over, Cik Jaja called me.
this time i really cried like shit la.
i feel Cik Jaja really understands me.
i told her everything my mum said to me and those text messages from Cik An.
i felt touched as she actually cried with me.
that was what i needed, someone who could share the pain with me.
"whatever happens, i will always be by your side"

i hate crying.
it makes my eyes all puffy and red.
my nose all itchy.
my head feels like exploding.
im like suffering when i cry.

when i reached home, all i could do was sit in my room, look through the courses that im qualified to get.
switched off my hp and slept till next morning.
my headache is killing me!

seems like im not gonna like whats gonna happen tonight and tomorrow.
Uncles.
Aunts.
Comparison.
Nagging.
Lectures.
Tears.

just wanna say Thank You to all of you for hearing my cries.
some of you might not understand my situation but nevertheless, Thanks.
i love you guys.